How to keep wife happy……..

Subject: how to keep your wife happy

NOT VERY EASY !

In the world, one single rule applies to the men: Make the Woman happy. Do something she likes, and you get points. Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted. You don’t get any points for doing something she expects. Sorry, that’s the way the game is played.

Here is a guide to the point system:

SIMPLE DUTIES
— You make the bed (+1)
— You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillow (0)
— You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets (-1)
— You go out to buy her what she wants (+5)
— In the rain (+8)
— But return with Beer (-5)
— You check out a suspicious noise at night (0)
— You check out a suspicious noise, and it is nothing (0)
— You check out a suspicious noise and it is something (+5)
— You pummel it with iron rod (+10)
— It’s her pet (-10)

SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS

— You stay by her side the entire party (0)
— You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a college buddy (-2)
— Named Tina (-4)
— Tina is a dancer (-10)

HER BIRTHDAY

— You take her out to dinner (0)
— You take her out to dinner and it’s not a sports bar (+1)
— Okay, it’s a sports bar (-2)
— And it’s all-you-can- eat night (-3)
— It’s a sports bar, it’s all-you-can- eat night, and your face is painted the colours of your favourite team (-10)

A NIGHT OUT

— You take her to a movie (+2)
— You take her to a movie she likes (+4)
— You take her to a movie you hate (+6)
— You take her to a movie you like (-2)
— It’s called ‘DeathCop’ (-3)
— You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans (-15)

YOUR PHYSIQUE

— You develop a noticeable potbelly (-15)
— You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it (+10)
— You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to baggy jeans and baggy Hawaiian shirts (-30)
— You say, “It doesn’t matter, you have one too.” (-8000)

ENJOY THE ‘BIG’ QUESTION

— She asks, “Do I look fat?” (-5) [Yes, you LOSE points no matter WHAT]
— You hesitate in responding (-10)
— You reply, “Where?” (-35)
— Any other response (-20)

COMMUNICATION

— When she wants to talk about a problem , you listen, displaying what looks like a concerned _____expression (0)
— You listen, for over 30 minutes (+50)
— You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV (+500)
— She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep (-10000)
——————–

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WHEN A LIZARD CAN, WHY CAN’T WE?

WHEN A LIZARD CAN, WHY CAN’T WE?

This is a true story that happened in Japan.
In order to renovate the house,
someone in Japan breaks open the wall.
Japanese houses normally have a hollow space between the wooden walls.
When tearing down the walls, he found that there was a lizard stuck there
because a nail from outside hammered into one of its feet.
He sees this, feels pity, and at the same time curious, as when he checked the nail,
it was nailed 5 years ago when the house was first built !!!

What happened?

The lizard has survived in such position for 5 years!!!!!!!!!!
In a dark wall partition for 5 years without moving, it is impossible and mind-boggling.
Then he wondered how this lizard survived for 5 years! without moving a single step–since its foot was nailed!
So he stopped his work and observed the lizard, what it has been doing, and what and how it has been eating.
Later, not knowing from where it came, appears another lizard, with food in its mouth.
Ah! He was stunned and touched deeply.
For the lizard that was stuck by nail, another lizard has been feeding it for the past 5 years…
Imagine? it has been doing that untiringly for 5 long years, without giving up hope on its partner.

Imagine what a small creature can do that a creature blessed with a brilliant mind can’t.


Please never abandon your loved ones
Never Say U R Busy When They Really Need You …
You May Have The Entire World At Your Feet…..
But You Might Be The Only World To Them….
A Moment of negligence might break the very heart which loves you thru all odds..

Before you say something just remember.. it takes a moment to Break but an entire lifetime to make…

Regards | Tejas Sompura

WORLD HISTORY FACTS ABOUT INDIA .

Some of the following facts may be known to you. These facts were recently published in a German magazine,

1. India never invaded any country in her last 1000 years of history.
2. India invented the Number system. Zero was invented by Aryabhatta.
3. The world’s first University was established in Takshila in 700BC. More than 10,500 students from all over the world studied more than 60 subjects. The University of Na landa built in the 4 th century BC was one of the greatest achievements of ancient India in the field of education.
4. According to the Forbes magazine, Sanskrit is the most suitable language for computer software.
5. Ayurveda is the earliest school of medicine known to humans.
6. Although western media portray modern images of India as poverty striken and underdeveloped through political corruption, India was once the richest empire on earth.
7. The art of navigation was born in the river Sindh 5000 years ago. The very word “Navigation” is derived from the Sanskrit word NAVGATIH.
8. The value of pi was first calculated by Budhayana, and he explained the concept of what is now k! Nown as the Pythagorean Theorem. British scholars have last year (1999) officially published that Budhayan’s works dates to the 6 th Century which is long before the European mathematicians.
9. Algebra, trigonometry and calculus came from India . Quadratic equations were by Sridharacharya in the 11 th Century; the largest numbers the Greeks and the Romans used were 106 whereas Indians used numbers as big as 10 53.
10. According to the Gemmological Institute of America, up until 1896, India was the only source of diamonds to the world.
11. USA based IEEE has proved what has been a century-old suspicion amongst academics that the pioneer of wireless communication was Professor Jagdeesh Bose and not Marconi.
12. The earliest reservoir and dam for irrigation was built in Saurashtra.
13. Chess was invented in India .
14. Sushruta is the father of surgery. 2600 years ago he and health scientists of his time conducted surgeries like cesareans, cataract, fractures and urinary stones. Usage of anaesthesia was well known in ancient India .
15. When many cultures in the world were only nomadic forest dwellers over 5000 years ago, Indians established Harappan culture in Sindhu Valley ( Indus Valley Civilisation) .
16. The place value system, the decimal system was developed in India in 100 BC.

Say proudly, I AM AN INDIAN.

Regards | Tejas Sompura


Diwali Festival In India

“Diwali”, the festival of lights, illuminates the darkness of the New Year’s moon, and strengthens our close friendships and knowledge, with a self-realization!

Diwali is celebrated on a nation-wide scale on Amavasya – the 15th day of the dark fortnight of the Hindu month of Ashwin, (October/November) every year. It symbolizes that age-old culture of India which teaches to vanquish ignorance that subdues humanity and to drive away darkness that engulfs the light of knowledge. Diwali, the festival of lights even to-day in this modern world projects the rich and glorious past of India.

Every year on the dark nights of Diwali the sound of firecrackers announces the celebration of the favorite festival of Indians. Homes are decorated, sweets are distributed by everyone and thousands of lamps are lit to create a world of fantasy. Of all the festivals celebrated in India, Diwali is by far the most glamorous and important. Enthusiastically enjoyed by people of every religion, its magical and radiant touch creates an atmosphere of joy and festivity.

The ancient story of how Diwali evolved into such a widely celebrated festival is different in various regions and states of India. In the north, particularly in Uttar Pradesh, Punjab, Haryana, Bihar and the surrounding areas, Diwali is the day when King Rama’s coronation was celebrated in Ayodhya after his epic war with Ravana, the demon king of Lanka. By order of the royal families of Ayodhya and Mithila, the kingdom of which Sita was princess, the cities and far-flung boundaries of these kingdoms were lit up with rows of lamps, glittering on dark nights to welcome home the divine king Rama and his queen Sita after 14 years of exile, ending with an across-the-seas war in which the whole of the kingdom of Lanka was destroyed.

On the day of Diwali festival, doorways are hung with torans of mango leaves and marigolds. Rangolis are drawn with different colored powders to welcome guests. The traditional motifs are often linked with auspicious symbols of good luck. Oil diyas are arranged in and around the house. Because of these flickering lamps, the festival has acquired its name : Dipawali or Diwali meaning ‘a rows of lamps’. On this day, people buy something for the house or some jewelry for the women of the house. It is auspicious to be buy something metallic, such as silver.

Whatever may be the fables and legends behind the celebrations of Diwali, all people exchange sweets, wear new clothes and buy jewelry at this festive time. Card parties are held in many homes. Diwali has become commercialized as the biggest annual consumer spree because every family shops for sweets, gifts and fireworks. However, in all this frenzy of shopping and eating, the steady, burning lamp is a constant symbol of an illuminated mind.

Wish you and your family a Very Happy Diwali and a Prosperous year.

Regards | Tejas Sompura & Family



Kali Choudas

Kali means Dark (evil) and Chaudas – Fourteenth. Thus, celebrated 14th day of Ashwin, Kali Chaudas is the day allotted to the worship of Maha-Kali or Shakti and is believed that on this day Kali killed the wicked Raktavija. Also referred to as Narak-Chaturdashi, Kali Chaudas is day to abolish laziness and evil which create hell in our life and shine light on life. The strength to protect others is referred as Kali, and if its used for God’s work it is called Mahakali.

Kali Chaudous is also attached to the legend of Lord Hanuman. Hanumanji as a baby was very hungry. Whilst lying down he saw the sun in the sky and thought it was a fruit and went to pick it. He flew into the sky and put the whole sun in his mouth causing darkness throughout the entire universe. Lord Indra requested that Hanumanji return the sun. When Hanumanji refused, Lord Indra unleashed his vajra and knocked Hanumanji down to earth releasing the Sun.

On this day we offer poojan to Hanumanji as our Kuldev to protect us from Evil. The poojan is performed with oil, flowers, chandan and sindur. Coconuts are also offered to Hanumanji and prashad of Sesame seed, ladoos and rice with ghee and sugar.

The rituals of Kali Choudas is strongly suggestive of the origin of Deepavaali as an harvest festival is performed. On this day delicacies are prepared from pounded semi-cooked rice (called Poha or Pova). This rice is taken from the fresh harvest available at that time. This custom is prevalent both in rural and urban areas especially in Western India.

On this day, a head wash and application of kajal in the eyes is believed to keep away the kali nazar (evil eye). Some say that those who are into tantra, learn their ‘mantras’ on this day. Alternatively, people offer Nived (food) to the goddess that is local to where they are originally from. This goddess is called their ‘Kul Devi’, in order to cast off evil spirits. Some families also offer food to their forefathers on this day. The second day of Diwali is known as Kali Choudas in Gujarat, Rajasthan & few part of Maharashtra. This reverence is called “Kali Chaudas or Kal Chaturdasi”.

Regards | Tejas Sompura